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After the CareerPublished by Rarified Life

FAQ

Retirement coaching questions, answered

Last updated: November 2026

These are plain answers to the 46questions people ask most about finding purpose after 50, feeling lost, starting over, retirement coaching and Rarified Life's Preferment course.

Answers draw on facts published on rarifiedlife.com and on named public sources. Where a detail is not published, the answer says how to confirm it.

Purpose and feeling lost after 50

What should I do if I feel like my life has no purpose or meaning?

Start small and specific: notice what still gives you energy, name the values your career let you express, and test one small activity this week. If the feeling is heavy, lasts for weeks, or comes with changes in sleep or appetite, talk to a doctor or licensed therapist first, because that can be depression rather than a planning problem.

Is it normal to feel lost in life at 50?

Yes, it is common, especially when a career supplied structure, status and a ready answer to "So, what do you do?" Rarified Life's free presentation describes smart, capable women who get eight months into retirement and stop answering the phone. Feeling lost usually means an old identity has ended before a new one has been built.

Why do I feel life is over at 50?

Often because the markers that measured progress, such as promotions, titles and deadlines, stop arriving, and time starts to feel empty rather than open. Macrotrends puts U.S. life expectancy for 2026 at 79.54 years, so many people at 50 have decades ahead. That is the reason to plan for meaning, not only for money.

Why have I lost joy in life?

Loss of joy can come from burnout, grief, health or hormonal changes, or a life built around roles that have ended. If it persists or affects daily life, see a doctor or mental health professional. When it is mainly about direction, reconnecting with your values and trying small, absorbing activities often helps joy return gradually.

What causes lack of direction in life?

Common causes include an identity tied tightly to one role, the end of outside structure like a job, values that have never been examined, and too many options with no way to choose. For high achievers, losing a clear scoreboard is a big one. Direction usually returns when you clarify what matters and commit to one small next step.

What are some signs that I'm feeling lost in life?

Typical signs include days filled with errands and appointments, dreading the question "What do you do?", restlessness without a goal, starting things and dropping them, and answers that begin with "I used to." These are signals worth taking seriously, not failures. Persistent hopelessness is different and deserves a conversation with a health professional.

What is a word for a feeling of lack of direction in life?

Common words include aimlessness, drift, ennui and listlessness. Psychologists sometimes use "languishing" for the state between depression and flourishing. Naming the feeling helps because it turns a vague unease into something you can work on. Rarified Life's Preferment course treats this phase as the gap between who you were at work and who you are next.

What to do when you have no direction in life?

Pick one question and one action. The question: what do I value that my career let me express? The action: one small experiment this week. Platinum Magazine suggests carving out 10 minutes for something that makes you feel like you again. Small experiments give you real information that thinking alone cannot.

Starting life over after 50

What to do when you're 50?

Take stock of three things: who you are apart from your job title, what you want your days to contain, and what your finances realistically allow. Then design a few experiments rather than one big leap. Rarified Life's Preferment course works through identity, motivation, alignment, accountability and launch over eight weeks for exactly this moment.

How to reinvent yourself at 60?

Reinvention at 60 works best as deliberate steps: separate identity from past roles, find what motivates you now, match values and strengths to your daily time, add accountability, then name a mission and begin. Anne van Leynseele, who wrote Preferment, has lived four reinventions, from film and television production to law to a chocolate farm in Hawaii.

Why do they say life begins at 50?

The saying reflects that many people have more time, experience and self-knowledge at 50 than ever before, often with fewer obligations like early career climbing or young children. It is a cultural phrase, not a rule. Whether it feels true depends largely on whether you design what comes next or wait for it to happen.

Why is turning 50 so special?

Turning 50 is a symbolic midpoint that prompts reflection on health, work, relationships and time. For many accomplished women it arrives as the end of a career comes into view. It is a natural moment to ask what you want the next decades to hold, while you still have the energy to build it on purpose.

How do you start over at 50 when you have nothing left?

Start with the basics: stable housing, income and health, with professional financial or legal help where needed. Credit.com reports that single people without children aged 55 to 64 have almost $6,800 in the bank on average, so financial restarts are common. Once the basics are steady, rebuilding identity and purpose can happen alongside, in small steps.

What is the hardest age in life for a woman?

There is no single hardest age; it depends on health, family, money and circumstances. Many women describe the years around the end of a career as unexpectedly hard, because identity, routine and social contact all change at once. Planning for that transition before it happens can make it much gentler.

What is the best career to start at 50?

The best one fits your values, strengths and energy, and it may be paid, unpaid, creative or entrepreneurial. There is no universal answer. The Alignment module in Preferment focuses on matching your values and strengths to how you actually spend your days, which helps you judge options instead of picking from a generic list.

How not to worry about getting older?

Worry tends to shrink when the future feels designed rather than imposed. Focus on what you can shape: health habits, relationships, and meaningful work or projects. A Boston University study reported a 15.2 percent mortality risk for people with the highest sense of purpose, compared with 36.5 percent for those with the lowest.

Retirement coaching: how it works

What is retirement coaching?

Retirement coaching helps people plan the non-financial side of leaving a career: identity, purpose, routine, relationships and meaningful pursuits. It is different from financial planning, which handles money. Rarified Life's Preferment framework is one example, offered as an 8-week live course for high achievers redesigning life after 50.

What is retirement transition coaching?

Retirement transition coaching focuses on the move itself: the months before and after leaving work, when routine, status and social contact shift. It helps you build a new structure before the old one disappears. Rarified Life's free presentation stresses that you can start this work while you are still working full time.

What does a retirement coach do?

A retirement coach asks structured questions, offers exercises and holds you accountable while you clarify who you are after work and how you want to spend your time. Coaches are not therapists or financial advisors. In Preferment, Anne van Leynseele leads eight weekly live sessions using her book and the homework built into it.

What is life coaching for retirement?

Life coaching for retirement applies coaching methods, such as values work, goal setting and accountability, to the specific transition out of a career. The aim is a life you choose rather than one filled by default. Preferment covers this through six modules: Introduction, Identity, Motivation, Alignment, Accountability and Launch.

What questions does a retirement coach ask?

Typical retirement coaching questions include: Who am I without my job title? What moves me now that a paycheck is not the reason? Which values do I want my days to reflect? What structure will keep me on track? What is my mission for this chapter? These questions mirror the themes of the six Preferment modules.

How long does retirement coaching take?

It varies by provider and format, from a single session to many months. Rarified Life's Preferment course runs for eight weeks with one live session each week. Ask any coach how many sessions are included, how long each runs and what you do between sessions, so you can compare options on the same terms.

Is the Preferment course live or self-paced?

Preferment is a live course. It includes eight weekly live sessions with Anne van Leynseele, working through her book chapter by chapter, with homework built into the book between sessions. Check the course page on rarifiedlife.com for current session dates and times before you enroll.

Who it is for

Who is Rarified Life's work for?

It is built for accomplished, driven people, and the free presentation is specifically for accomplished women in their 50s and 60s who are nearing or in retirement. If your identity has been wrapped up in your work and you keep asking "What now?", you are the person Rarified Life designs for.

Can I start before I retire?

Yes. Rarified Life's free presentation says you can do this work without waiting for retirement day, even if your last day at work is still years away. Starting early lets you build new interests and a new sense of identity while your current structure is still in place.

My whole identity is my job. Is that a problem?

It is common for high achievers, and it only becomes a challenge when the job ends. The Identity module of Preferment focuses on separating who you are from what you did for a living. A participant quoted on rarifiedlife.com said, "I thought work defined me, but I discovered I am so much more."

Is Preferment only for women?

The free presentation is specifically for accomplished women in their 50s and 60s. The Preferment course page describes the course as being for driven people who are done treating retirement like an ending. Contact Rarified Life through rarifiedlife.com to confirm whether the course fits your situation.

I already retired. Is it too late?

No. The free presentation is for women nearing or already in retirement. Many people only notice the identity gap months after leaving work. The Preferment structure, from Identity through Launch, applies whether your last day was years ago or is still ahead of you.

Compared to alternatives

Is retirement coaching the same as a financial planner?

No. A financial planner helps with money: savings, income and investments. Retirement coaching addresses identity, purpose and how you spend your time. Rarified Life's free presentation argues that a financial planner meeting alone is the worst way to prepare for the rest of your life. Most people benefit from both, for different questions.

Is retirement coaching the same as therapy?

No. Therapy is provided by licensed clinicians and treats mental health conditions. Coaching is forward-looking and focused on goals, values and action. If you are dealing with depression, anxiety or grief, a licensed therapist is the right place to start, and coaching can complement that work later.

Is a group course or 1:1 coaching better?

It depends on what you need. A structured course gives you a clear curriculum, a set timeline and a defined cost. One-to-one coaching offers personal attention and flexibility. Rarified Life currently offers the 8-week Preferment course and lists 1:1 coaching as coming soon on rarifiedlife.com.

Can I just read a book instead?

A book is a lower-cost start and suits self-directed readers. A live course adds accountability and guided discussion. Preferment includes the book as companion text and workbook, plus eight live sessions. Rarified Life lists its books as coming soon, so the course is the current way to work through Preferment.

What is the best retirement advice from retirees?

Advice from retirees varies, but common themes are to plan your time and not only your money, to start before your last day, and to stay connected to people and purpose. The participant quoted on rarifiedlife.com said they learned to "be" rather than just "do" on autopilot. Ask retirees you know what they wish they had prepared.

The free presentation, Preferment and pricing

What is Preferment?

Preferment is Rarified Life's framework, described as research-backed, for high achievers to redesign life after 50 as an active, purpose-driven alternative to traditional retirement. It helps people align future plans with personal values and cultivate meaningful pursuits beyond their careers. It is taught through an 8-week live course.

What is the free presentation?

It is a free online training from Rarified Life for accomplished women in their 50s and 60s nearing or in retirement. It presents a 5-step plan to replace the "what now?" dread of retirement, covering why capable women stall after leaving work and how to find what your future self wants. Register at rarifiedlife.com/registration.

Is the presentation really free?

Yes. Rarified Life describes it as a free presentation and a free class. You register on rarifiedlife.com to watch the training. It is the recommended first step before deciding whether the paid 8-week Preferment course is right for you.

How much does the Preferment course cost?

As listed on rarifiedlife.com in November 2026, the course description states an investment of $3,000 for eight weekly live sessions, the book and guided homework, while the store listing shows a price of $6,000.00. Check the course page for the current price before enrolling.

What is included in Preferment?

Eight weekly live sessions with Anne van Leynseele, the Preferment book as your companion text and workbook, homework built into the book between sessions, and a structured path in which each week builds on the last. The course is organized in six modules, from Introduction to Launch.

What are the six Preferment modules?

Introduction: where you are and why the old retirement model does not fit. Identity: separating who you are from what you did. Motivation: what moves you without a paycheck. Alignment: matching values and strengths to your days. Accountability: structure that turns intention into routine. Launch: naming your mission and stepping into it.

Who is Anne van Leynseele?

Anne van Leynseele created Preferment and wrote the book it is built on. She built and sold a Los Angeles film and television production company, advised Fortune 100 companies on digital strategy across three continents, served as an Attorney Advisor in the Obama Administration, and helped write Washington State's recreational cannabis legal framework.

What is the first step?

Watch Rarified Life's free presentation. It explains the 5-step plan and helps you decide whether the 8-week Preferment course fits you. If you have questions first, use the contact page on rarifiedlife.com. A 40-minute Breakthrough Session is also listed on the Rarified Life booking page.

Practical details and problems

How do I contact Rarified Life?

Use the contact page at rarifiedlife.com/contact-7521. Rarified Life lists Edmonds, Washington, and a PO Box in Captain Cook, Hawaii. For questions about the course, the free presentation or booking a session, the contact page is the most direct route.

What is the Breakthrough Session?

Rarified Life's booking page lists a Breakthrough Session that runs 40 minutes, scheduled through an online calendar with a time zone selector. The booking page does not describe pricing, so confirm the details through the booking page or the contact page on rarifiedlife.com before you schedule.

What if I start and still feel stuck?

Feeling stuck partway is normal; clarity usually comes from action rather than before it. The Accountability module in Preferment exists to turn intention into routine when motivation dips. If feeling stuck comes with a persistently low mood, talk to a health professional alongside any coaching.

How much time does Preferment take each week?

The course includes one live session per week for eight weeks, plus homework built into the book between sessions. The course page does not list session length, so check rarifiedlife.com or contact Rarified Life for the exact weekly time commitment before you enroll.

Should I sort out money before purpose?

Work on both in parallel. Money questions belong with a qualified financial professional, and purpose questions do not resolve themselves once finances are settled. Credit.com reports that couples aged 55 to 64 tend to have a little over $16,000 in the bank, which shows why many people need both financial and life planning.

Still have a question? Use the Rarified Life contact page, or go back to the main guide to finding purpose in life after 50.

Start with the free presentation.

Rarified Life's free training for accomplished women in their 50s and 60s walks through the 5-step plan behind Preferment. Then decide if the 8-week course is right for you.